5 Actionable Ways to Help You Lead at Home
Jun 01, 2018
The whole concept of "Leading at home, winning at life" may seem ideal to many people, but it doesn't happen overnight. It comes with making big decisions that will impact the way you live and lead.
We believe that with a God-focused mindset, everything else will fall into place.
With God at #1... marriages thrive, parenthood produces fruit, and God expresses favor over your career. If done in the opposite order, many people will find that filling their career bucket first will lead to much unhappiness and dissatisfaction.
Today, we bring you the 5 Actionable Ways to Help You Lead At Home And Win At Life.
Leading at home will help you...
1: Rethink your priorities
At the beginning of 2017, I went on The Millennial Leadership Show, and made a promise to my listeners that I would read one book per week for a whole year. That's a whopping total of 52 books! As soon as the show ended, I cringed.
How in the world am I going to do this? What did I get myself into?
Well, I have good news and bad news. The good news is that I finished 70 books last year (go me!). The bad news is that when I was about 40 books in, my wife Selina asked me a life-altering question.
"How many of those 40 books were on marriage or parenting?"
It hit me like a ton of bricks. My answer was a miserable... ZERO.
I told myself that this is not how it is supposed to be. If God is #1, Selina is #2, my children are #3, and my health is #4... Then why was I spending all of my energy growing in the #5 area of my life?
For the second half of 2017, I decided to change my strategy and grow in the most important areas of my life.
2: Rediscover your purpose
If I learned anything from hosting the Millennial Leadership Show, I learned that many millennials ask the same question, "What is my purpose in life?"
The funny thing is that I have found that this is not just a millennial problem, it's a humanity problem. I feel like many of us are asking the right question, but we are framing the question incorrectly.
We subconsciously add a second part to that question by asking ourselves... "What is my purpose in life... as it relates to my career?"
For me, we are framing the question incorrectly. If we are asking what our purpose is without getting thinking about our purpose for God, marriage, and family is... Then we are doing it in the wrong order.
It makes much more sense to figure out my purpose as it relates to my priorities first, and then find purpose in work. Rather than to find purpose in work and neglect my top priorities.
3: Review your time
We are a distracted society. Although smartphones and technology can benefit us in so many ways, they can also distract us from what is important.
The honest truth is that Selina and I struggled to have quality date nights for some time. Until we discovered a simple, but profound strategy for date night... leaving our phones in the car!
We have had the best date nights when we rid ourselves of distractions. On this particular night when we got back to the car, we saw that we had 30 notifications waiting for us in the 90 minutes that we spent together. If you do the math, that's one notification every 3 minutes. To put it more plainly, that's one distraction every 3 minutes. How can any meaningful conversation take place when one is being disrupted every 3 minutes?
If you take a good look at your daily and weekly schedule, you may be able to pin point where quality time ought to occur. Make the commitment to lead with quality time, not just quantity.
4: Redesign your life
You must design the life that you want, based on your priorities, based on your purpose, based on your time. If you don’t prioritize your life, someone else will. You must learn to make commitments to yourself and stick with them. Don’t let others rule you and dictate what’s important and what’s not, that’s your decision.
If your job is leaving you overwhelmed and burnt out... pray for a new job. If your boss plays a big part of dictating your time, pray about how you would approach this situation. God gives us free-will to choose as we please. Part of that free-will is exercising our freedom of choosing the right path. Some path's may lead you in the wrong direction, while others may lead you to a better place in life. Choose wisely.
5: Reset your home
One of our biggest passions is setting the tone in my home and having clear expectations for our family. We want to lead our children spiritually, physically, intellectually, and emotionally by doing as much as we can now with them in our home rather than when they are off on their own.
It's about realizing what the gaps are in your home, and filling them up. For some people, resetting their home is to get back to the basics of time management. For others, it's stepping up and putting more intentionality in their efforts. And yet still, for others it's completely throwing everything off the table and starting over.
No matter what stage you are in, there is one thing that remains true. You can't do it alone. Resetting your home requires attention and intention.
Leading at home will help set you up for success. With a God-focused mentality, leading at home will help you win at life.